Lucky Me..... *Note the sarcasm please

Phoebe wakes up at six this morning shrieking like a banshee. This riles up Matty who tries to initiate a wrestling match of massive proportions. I disengage from Matty, whip Phoebe into a fresh diaper and head to the back yard to let the dog out.

Everything was starting out just like it always does on a Sunday morning....

But then my nose was assaulted by a repugnant, wretched smell. I search the room to discover two giant dog poopies and a puddle of pee. As I was scrubbing up the poop and the pee, Phoebe decided to help out- as only she can, by stepping in a poop pile that I had not yet identified.

Phoebe then proceeds to walk around with her bare feet covered in poop. Matty meanwhile calling the puppy with fake whistling "Whooeee-whoo!!!" Dang annoying when you're tired, cleaning up poop and trying to chase down a poop covered baby.

Now that the mess is entirely cleaned up I head to the kitchen only to discover- NO COFFEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After which the dog pees again, Phoebe slips in the unseen puddle, puppy goes on a time out and I have more to clean up- lucky, lucky me. If my day gets any worse I may end up either huddled in bed or biznitch slapping someone before the day is through.